that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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