I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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