But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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