Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
