It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
