I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Green mimosas i think yes
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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