Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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