he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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