Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water

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  (914): so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water http://tfl.nu/wymr
  Replies (3) Good night (668) Bad night (914)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

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  (317): Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother. http://tfl.nu/z8j5
  Replies (28) Good night (1716) Bad night (640)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.

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  (206): Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick. http://tfl.nu/0596
  Replies (43) Good night (1206) Bad night (2831)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?

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  (202): Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded? http://tfl.nu/h9bc
  Replies (19) Good night (1883) Bad night (3921)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened

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  (617): there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened http://tfl.nu/7n12
  Replies (8) Good night (4303) Bad night (728)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.

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  (480): We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids. http://tfl.nu/o5lf
  Replies (15) Good night (3186) Bad night (1382)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?

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  (251): Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"? http://tfl.nu/ubao
  Replies (6) Good night (3827) Bad night (923)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.

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  (239): MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned. http://tfl.nu/x1yo
  Replies (6) Good night (1219) Bad night (2581)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...

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  (908): At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ... http://tfl.nu/ikiv
  Replies (10) Good night (1181) Bad night (1424)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  My booty call just moved 2 min from my house

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  This has pregnancy written all over it

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  (513): My booty call just moved 2 min from my house (1-513): This has pregnancy written all over it http://tfl.nu/2h6m
  Replies (1) Good night (1528) Bad night (471)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.

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  (314): I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed. http://tfl.nu/a0tv
  Replies (5) Good night (1090) Bad night (240)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.

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  (727): Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best. http://tfl.nu/j1qb
  Replies (3) Good night (929) Bad night (251)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.

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  (505): He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself. http://tfl.nu/17i2
  Replies (0) Good night (284) Bad night (464)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup

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  (919): I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup http://tfl.nu/nvuh
  Replies (2) Good night (378) Bad night (216)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.

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  (507): I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer. http://tfl.nu/rx9x
  Replies (3) Good night (523) Bad night (252)

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