i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
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