I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
