i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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