its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
