those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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