I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.