okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I just gargled with NyQuil
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
