connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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