Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
