worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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