Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
