im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
