dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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