If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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