When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Buhtt sex?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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