so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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