Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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