did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize