real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
