Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
