you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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