ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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