hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
