dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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