did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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