Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?

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(617): This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off? http://tfl.nu/xunp

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did

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(910): Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did http://tfl.nu/f390

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com

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(203): I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com http://tfl.nu/9o3u

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(636): View more from Missouri

No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.

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(636): No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from. http://tfl.nu/d5gf

Replies (4) Good night (899) Bad night (2839) Order T-Shirt
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(773): View more from Illinois

Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.

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(773): Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices. http://tfl.nu/v05l

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(630): View more from Illinois

I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.

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(630): I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy. http://tfl.nu/cb6u

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.

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(724): you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles. http://tfl.nu/nryc

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(270): View more from Kentucky

The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".

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(270): The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard". http://tfl.nu/w1c8

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(904): View more from Florida

I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.

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(904): I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. http://tfl.nu/je7l

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(415): View more from California

Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.

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(415): Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited. http://tfl.nu/jdnb

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(609): View more from New Jersey

We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.

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(609): We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend. http://tfl.nu/121k

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese

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(414): I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese http://tfl.nu/evtb

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.

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(+44): How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic. http://tfl.nu/9kr6

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(213): View more from California

Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!

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(213): Well, we won the drunk before noon contest! http://tfl.nu/g4t1

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?

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(605): Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night? http://tfl.nu/gtih

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