lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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