I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
