David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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