you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
