who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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