Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize