My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
