Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
