they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
