i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
