My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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