look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
