I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
