Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize