he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Dignity is for republicans.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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