Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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