So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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