Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
