It's Friday. Sex?
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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